Dear Sabrina,
Thank you for contacting Ask an Advisor.
We are sorry about this situation, and understand that it is difficult and distressing for you. Unfortunately, it’s not realistically possible to resolve it at a distance. But we can offer some thoughts for your consideration, which might be helpful to you.
Conflicts are often best resolved through dialogue, and often through planning before dialogue starts. In your case, who should you be talking to first? There might be value in meeting first with some members of the community who feel as you do. This could be a small group.
At such a meeting, you could then share your feelings and your analysis of the situation, and perhaps plan a strategy together. A strategy might include specific goals, and also specific actions designed to reach those goals.
A next step might involve a meeting with the larger community, to share your own thinking so far, and also to learn what community members feel, what they want, and how they think you should proceed.
A step after that might include a meeting with the Board of Directors, with the same general agenda; the details would vary depending on the make-up of the current Board and how its members feel. One more step after that could be a meeting with the management company, especially if it is new and unfamiliar with the situation.
In other words, you could take a gradual but planned-out approach, working together with others, and building support and strength as you work your way up to higher levels of authority.
In addition, though, if there is a question of possible illegal activities such as threats on life, then you might wish to contact local legal authorities, and/or your local legislators. Your camera phone may be useful in these instances.
You can of course vary any of this depending on the details of your situation. But we feel the general principles of planning before acting, acting together with others, engaging in open dialogue, stating clear positions and recommendations – and persisting – will be useful to you.
We don’t want to minimize your situation, or to suggest that there is an easy or rapid solution to it; but we do believe that you and others have the power to change it, and that you can in fact use that power to make desired change happen.
It is still worth reading the materials on our site under "Learn a Skill" and Chapter 1 "Our Model for Social Change."
Best wishes,
Ask an Advisor
