Chapter 22. Youth Mentoring Programs | Section 6. Youth Goal Setting | Tools

Tool 1: A contract for your relationship

A mentor/protégé contract is a tool for discussion. Since communication is essential to any relationships, it can help you clarify expectations on many issues before conflict arises.

Use this contract in the following manner:

Respond to every question with your preferences. Being honest now will save time and hurt feelings later
Examine and discuss your differences, focusing and understanding the reasons behind answers that are different from yours
Try to agree on a way to compromise or resolve those differences now, before conflicts arise
Write down your agreements

Mentor/protégé contract

Relationship

Are you willing to trust your mentor?
Are you willing to trust your protégé?
How many times a week are the protégé and mentor supposed to meet?
During these meetings, what are they supposed to do? (talk, go to the movies, study?)
How much time will be allotted for study? How much time will be allotted for fun activities?

Personal

Where are the meetings supposed to take place?
What is an activity that you love doing?
What is an activity that you hate doing?
Are you outgoing? Would you rather go out or stay home?
What do you like to talk about?
What do you hate to talk about?
What's your favorite type of movie? What's your favorite type of music?

Education

In which area of study are mentor and protégé going to focus first?
- And later?
What is going to be the method of measuring progress?
How are mentor and protégé going to celebrate good results?

Tool 2: Action Plan form

Initiative	Date
Action step or change to be accomplished:
What actions or changes will occur:
Who will carry it out:
By when (for how long):
What resources are needed:
Communications (who should know what):

Tool 3: Youth concerns review

This is a questionnaire that asks the youths to evaluate certain aspects of their lives such as family and social relationships, school achievement, and personal capacities.

The purpose of this guide is to help protégés think about their dreams and goals and how to reach them. The protégé may complete this by him or herself or with a mentor, parent, friend, or someone who cares about him or her.

The questions in the first part ask the protégé to think about personal resources and the challenges to be faced. The second set of questions is supposed to help identify what is important to the youth and what he would like to change. Then the youth chooses the most important goals and thinks about how to meet those goals.

PART ONE

Dreams for My Life

Spend some time thinking about your dreams for your future, or your goals in life. Some of these may be short term (you want to do them in the next few months or a year). Others might be longer term (you will need more than a year to accomplish them).

How would you like your life to look overall?

Start by thinking of the big picture. What are your dreams and goals for your life in general? Write down your ideas here.

SOON:_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

LATER:____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

What do you see yourself doing in the following areas soon? Later?

Now think about specific areas of your life. Write down your short-term and long -term goals in each of the following areas.

How far do you hope to go in school? What type of education do you want?

SOON:_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
LATER:____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

What kind of job do you hope for?

What are your dreams for health? For security and being safe?

What kind of family life do you hope for?

What kinds of friendships and personal relationships do you hope for?

What types of fun and recreation do you hope for?

What are your dreams for living on your own or being independent?

In what ways do you hope to be involved in your community?

What sort of spiritual life do you hope for?

My Assets and Strengths

Skills and Experience:

Take a few minutes to think about your skills and experiences. Please circle the items from the list below that identify skills and experiences of which you are proud. Then write down an example or an explanation for each item you circle. At the end, write in skills and experiences that you value, but are not listed.

I can read well _____________________________________________________
I can write well _____________________________________________________
I can speak a different language _______________________________________
I am good at math __________________________________________________
I can use computers ________________________________________________
I can drive well _____________________________________________________
I can paint or draw __________________________________________________
I can organize things ________________________________________________
I can fix things _____________________________________________________
I can play with children ______________________________________________
I can care for children _______________________________________________
I can play sports ___________________________________________________
I can build things___________________________________________________
I can cook ________________________________________________________
I can sew/knit/crochet _______________________________________________
I can grow plants ___________________________________________________
I can target shoot well _______________________________________________
I can hunt well _____________________________________________________
I can talk with friends and family _______________________________________
I have lived in other countries __________________________________________
I have held a job ____________________________________________________
I can play a musical instrument well _____________________________________
I can do arts and crafts well ____________________________________________
I care for animals well ________________________________________________
(add your own)______________________________________________________
(add your own)______________________________________________________

Personal Qualities:

Take a few minutes to think about your personal qualities. What characteristics do you have? How do you act toward others? Please circle the items from the list below that identify personal qualities of which you are proud. Then write in an explanation or example for each item you circle. At the end, write in any personal qualities that you value, but may not be listed.

I am caring of others _________________________________________________
I am courteous/respectful of others ______________________________________
I am religious/spiritual ________________________________________________
I am kind to others ___________________________________________________
I am cheerful toward others ____________________________________________
I am tolerant of others ________________________________________________
I can be trusted by friends and family _____________________________________
I am loyal to my family and friends _______________________________________
I am helpful to others _________________________________________________
I am friendly toward others _____________________________________________
I am responsible ____________________________________________________
I am sensitive _______________________________________________________
I am loving ________________________________________________________
I am up-front with people _______________________________________________
I am direct _________________________________________________________
I am honest ________________________________________________________
I am shy/quiet ______________________________________________________
(add your own)______________________________________________________
(add your own)______________________________________________________
(add your own)______________________________________________________

My Challenges

Take a few minutes to think about possible barriers or obstacles that may be holding you back from doing things you want. Please circle the items from the list below that identify those barriers or obstacles. Then write down an explanation or example for each item you circle. At the end, write in any barriers or obstacles that you encounter, but are not listed.

It's hard for me to read _________________________________________________
It's hard for me to write ________________________________________________
It's hard for me to add or subtract _________________________________________
It's hard for me to find the time to do some things ____________________________
It's hard for me to get organized __________________________________________
It's hard for me to get places _____________________________________________
It's hard for me to pay for things I want______________________________________
It's hard for me to make new friends _______________________________________
It's hard for me to understand what people say and do _________________________
It's hard for me to talk with some people ____________________________________
It's hard for me to get people to understand me _______________________________
It's hard for me to stay out of jail __________________________________________
I experience discrimination ______________________________________________
I experience violence __________________________________________________
I experience abuse or neglect _____________________________________________
I experience drug or alcohol abuse _________________________________________
I experience poverty ___________________________________________________
I experience a disability ________________________________________________
I experience fear _____________________________________________________
(add your own) ______________________________________________________
(add your own) ______________________________________________________
(add your own) ______________________________________________________
(add your own) ______________________________________________________

Please take a few minutes to look back over the last section where you circled your strengths and abilities. Keep those qualities in mind as you go on to Part Two.

PART TWO:

Determining what is important to you

To set goals for yourself, you may work by yourself or with a mentor, parent, or friend to answer the questions that follow. Please go through each issue in every area and answer the following questions:

Is this issue one that I care about?
Am I where I want to be with this issue?

Next to each issue in the list are two columns where you circle your answer:

In the left-hand column, circle "No" if you don't care about the issue; or circle "Yes" if you do care about the issue.
In the right-hand column, circle "Yes" if you would like to do better at or with the issue; or circle "No" if you don't feel you need to do better at or with the issue, or if doing better at or with the issue is unimportant to you.

At the end of each section under the heading "Other", you will find space to write down any other issue that you think is important.

	I care about:		I would like to do better at:
Education and Training
Getting a high school diploma or GED	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having good grades	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting a college degree	Yes	No	Yes	No
Going to tech / trade school	Yes	No	Yes	No
Passing a specific class	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting to the next grade	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having better attendance	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having good test scores	Yes	No	Yes	No
Joining in extracurricular activities	Yes	No	Yes	No
Learning and understanding things	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having the skills I need to get a good job	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting along with my teachers	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting along with my classmates	Yes	No	Yes	No
Other (be specific):	Yes	No	Yes	No
Work
Getting part-time work	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting full-time work	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting on-the-job training, or becoming an apprentice in a job I want	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting a better job	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting another job	Yes	No	Yes	No
Starting a business	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being at work on time	Yes	No	Yes	No
Doing better at my work	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting more done at my job	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting along with my boss	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting along with other workers	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting more respect for my work	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting a raise	Yes	No	Yes	No
Other (be specific):	Yes	No	Yes	No
Health and Safety
Exercising more	Yes	No	Yes	No
Not using tobacco	Yes	No	Yes	No
Not doing drugs or drinking	Yes	No	Yes	No
Feeling good about myself	Yes	No	Yes	No
Eating well (eating healthy food)	Yes	No	Yes	No
Eating less junk food and fast food	Yes	No	Yes	No
Avoiding STDs and HIV/AIDS	Yes	No	Yes	No
Not getting pregnant or getting someone pregnant	Yes	No	Yes	No
Not getting hurt or killed	Yes	No	Yes	No
Not hurting or killing anyone	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being able to go to a doctor	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being able to go to a dentist	Yes	No	Yes	No
Looking and feeling good	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting vaccinated against diseases	Yes	No	Yes	No
Not feeling sad or badly about myself	Yes	No	Yes	No
Wearing seat belts and a bike helmet (when applicable)	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting enough sleep	Yes	No	Yes	No
Not driving drunk	Yes	No	Yes	No
Not riding with a drunk driver	Yes	No	Yes	No
Other (be specific):	Yes	No	Yes	No
Relationships
Having more friends	Yes	No	Yes	No
Making better friends	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having friends who are good for me	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being more accepted	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being more assertive	Yes	No	Yes	No
Communicating better	Yes	No	Yes	No
Spending more time with adults	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being around people who care for me	Yes	No	Yes	No
Spending more time with friends	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having different kinds of friends	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being a better listener	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being a good friend	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being a good sister / brother	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting along with people	Yes	No	Yes	No
Other (be specific):	Yes	No	Yes	No
Family
Getting along better with my family	Yes	No	Yes	No
Staying away from sexual or physical abuse	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being treated well at home	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting to know my family better	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being able to express anger without being violent	Yes	No	Yes	No
Using discipline without violence	Yes	No	Yes	No
Using discipline that is fair and consistent	Yes	No	Yes	No
Making rules that are reasonable	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having my family show me they care about me	Yes	No	Yes	No
Showing my family that I care about them	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having family traditions and celebrations	Yes	No	Yes	No
Doing more things with my family	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being able to talk and share my feelings with my family	Yes	No	Yes	No
Other (be specific):	Yes	No	Yes	No
Recreation and Leisure
Enjoying my free time	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having more free time	Yes	No	Yes	No
Playing more sports	Yes	No	Yes	No
Spending time doing things I like to do	Yes	No	Yes	No
Spending time doing arts and crafts	Yes	No	Yes	No
Spending more time outside	Yes	No	Yes	No
Having safe, late-night activities to do	Yes	No	Yes	No
Finding a hobby	Yes	No	Yes	No
Joining an organization	Yes	No	Yes	No
Meeting people with the same interests	Yes	No	Yes	No
Trying something new	Yes	No	Yes	No
Other (be specific):	Yes	No	Yes	No
Independent Living
Living on my own	Yes	No	Yes	No
Developing my own interests	Yes	No	Yes	No
Managing my money	Yes	No	Yes	No
Learning how to enjoy being alone	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being able to get around (such as on a bus, bike, train, etc.).	Yes	No	Yes	No
Taking better care of my stuff	Yes	No	Yes	No
Paying my bills on time	Yes	No	Yes	No
Reducing my expenses	Yes	No	Yes	No
Finding a good place to live	Yes	No	Yes	No
Planning better for future bills	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting things I need around the house	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting food for my family	Yes	No	Yes	No
Other (be specific):	Yes	No	Yes	No
Community Involvement
Volunteering or becoming a volunteer	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being a good neighbor	Yes	No	Yes	No
Helping others	Yes	No	Yes	No
Getting involved in solving problems in my community	Yes	No	Yes	No
Knowing more about my community	Yes	No	Yes	No
Using more community resources (such as parks and recreation programs)	Yes	No	Yes	No
Voting	Yes	No	Yes	No
Participating in community activities	Yes	No	Yes	No
Changing / influencing my community	Yes	No	Yes	No
Helping others get involved in the community	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being a good role model	Yes	No	Yes	No
Other (be specific):	Yes	No	Yes	No
Spiritual Development
Joining a church / mosque / synagogue	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being more active in my religious group	Yes	No	Yes	No
Practicing my faith better	Yes	No	Yes	No
Understanding my religion better	Yes	No	Yes	No
Showing that I care about other people	Yes	No	Yes	No
Being more accepting of others	Yes	No	Yes	No
Treating others as I want to be treated	Yes	No	Yes	No

Once the youth has finished this section, a mentor, parent, or other caring adult should help them with the remaining sections.

PART THREE:

Recognizing Personal Strengths

These are issues that the youth should feel proud of and needs to work on to maintain and protect.

After the youth has finished answering the questions in part two, it is time to select his or her strengths and concerns. Go back to the question section and help the youth find the items where he or she circled Yes (indicating that he or she does care about the issue) and No (indicating that he or she doesn't feel the need to do better at the issue). These items are personal strengths. Go back to the questions section and use your protégés responses to help him or her identify his or her personal strengths.

Copy from Part Two those personal strengths that the youth agrees on:

Encourage the youth to celebrate and share these strengths with others!

Identifying Personal Concerns / Problem Areas

To identify possible personal problem areas, the youth should go back to the question section and draw a ring around any issues where the circles are side by side.

Those items where the youth circled Yes that he or she does care about the issue and Yes that he or she would like to do better at the issue are possible areas of concern that the youth can work on to improve. Review them and list below all those items of concern that the youth wants to do something about soon.

When choosing the main issues, the young person should think about the following:

Issues that may help the youth plan for the future
Issues that the youth can do something about
Issues that the youth is ready to work on
Issues that would seriously affect his or her well-being if he or she doesn't work on it

Go back over the questions in Part Two and write below the issues that the youth may want to work on:

Prioritizing Personal Concerns

Before the youth can begin planning to reach goals for each item, he or she needs to prioritize the problems and rank them according to their importance. The youth should rank the list of issues by him or herself, with 1 being the highest priority.

After the issues have been ranked, the youth and mentor should discuss the list and why issues are in that order.

For example, an individual has ranked the following seven items:

Item	Rank
Volunteering or becoming a volunteer	6
Getting enough sleep	7
Being at work on time	4
Not doing drugs or drinking	1
Being a good friend	3
Practicing my faith better	5
Having good grades	2

In the chart, have the youth fill in the issues listed above as Personal Concerns / Problem Areas
Then, have the youth think about each issue by itself, asking the following questions:
- How important is this issue?
- Does it need to be dealt with right away or can it wait?
- Does this issue affect others as well? (If so, it may be more important)

Item	Rank

Planning for Action

After your protégé has finished identifying his or her goals, it's time to talk about an action plan for meeting those priorities. A good action plan helps us recognize all the steps we need to take to meet our goals. It also helps us be ready for difficulties we might face when trying to meet goals.

You will want to discuss:

What actions are needed to reach the goal
Who will take the actions (someone else besides the youth may be involved)
When the actions will happen
Resources and support needed to take the actions
Difficulties your protégé might face in taking the actions
People your protégé should talk to about his or her plans

Help your protégé make an action plan for each of the top priority issues he or she identifies.

Section 6. Youth Goal Setting

Chapter 22 Sections